I'll hold my breath
by smaragdbird
Summary: Clint has some issues regarding his relationship with Coulson. Natasha sets him straight. Coulson/Hawkeye slash


Clint wasn't too sure how he got robed into the Avenger's round of "marry, shag, throw off a cliff" but as always when he was in doubt he blamed Natasha. On the other it was fun watching Steve squirm a little bit.

"Okay, "Bruce said, "Nick Fury." Everyone winced slightly.

"Cliff." Tony declared.

"Shag, "Steve squirmed and blushed.

"Shag." Thor decided.

"Marry," Everyone stared at Bruce. "What? You could do worse."

"Cliff." Clint said, as, to his surprise, did Natasha.

"Problems with your boss?" Tony asked smirking.

"He deserves it." Natasha replied in a tone that made clear she didn't want to talk about it. She rubbed her hands. "Okay, let's see...Coulson...I say marry him."

"Marry, "Thor declared, nearly drowning out Steve's mumbled "marry."

Marry," Bruce agreed.

Even Tony said "marry," if nearly as quietly as Steve.

Clint stared at all of them. "Did I wander into a universe where Coulson is Brad Pitt?" He asked disbelievingly.

"He's a good man." Steve said almost defensively.

"A capable warrior, too," Thor joined in.

"He'd probably be a good husband," Tony shrugged, "you know dependable, faithful, attentive."

"Funny," Natasha added. "Probably good in bed as well, you know the kind of lover who listens to your body."

Natasha hummed in agreement. "Why, what about you Clint? Don't tell me you'd cliff him."

"Of course not! I...I'd shag him." It didn't sound convincing and he knew it.

"He probably wouldn't." Tony snickered, "Coulson's not really the one night stand guy, is he?"

"Unlike you, you mean?" Natasha asked.

"Hey, I've got at least one person here who'd marry me," he winked at Steve who promptly blushed again, "Clint was the one you all wanted to shag and then throw out before breakfast, remember?"

Clint was feeling defensive. Natasha threw him a look but thankfully the others had already moved on to the topic of Loki with the interesting revelation that Thor would marry his brother, and everyone else would shag him.

/

"Hey, earlier, what was that?" Natasha caught him later.

"What are you talking about?"

"Your reaction when we all said we would marry Coulson?"

"Yeah it's nothing, just a thing." Clint tried to dissuade her interest.

"One or the other, I think. Which is it, a thing or nothing?" But he really should know Natasha better than that by now.

"Just drop it, okay?"

"Oh my, you and..."Realisation dawned on her face, "oh my god, Coulson."

"No, no, it isn't, we haven't...It isn't anything."

"Isn't it?" She asked knowingly. "How long?"

"Four years but that's...You can't tell anyone." Clint said firmly.

"Why? Are you afraid your reputation will suffer when anyone finds out that you're in a long term, stable relationship?"

"It's not that, I just..."

"What the hell s wrong with you? Are you holding out for someone better? Or even younger? Is he not quite perfect enough for you? Are you really that stupidly self-sacrificing that you aren't just grabbing with both hands?"

"For his sake," Clint continued as if he hadn't heard her.

"For his sake?" Natasha sputtered disbelievingly.

"I don't want him to feel obliged to stay with me just because everyone knows when he could do much better than me."

Natasha stared at him as if he had grown a second head.

"Come on, Tash, you said yourself that I'm not the guy you'd keep around for breakfast." He didn't meet her eyes but tried to keep his voice light as if the prospect of Coulson leaving him was something he could laugh away while his insides turned to ice at the thought alone.

"Do you realise that during the last four years Coulson turned down every job offer and every promotion and no one knew why? I'd say he's pretty much settled on you."

"He...what?" Clint stared at her.

"You didn't know," she sounded resigned. "Maybe you should talk to him before deciding that you're just a compromise for him."

With that she left him alone with his shaken world image.

/

The next time they went out, because for all their super-secret-government-agency-dealing-with-crazy-stuff-lives their relationship was actually pretty average, Clint didn't know what to expect.

"Natasha said some things about you..."Clint started carefully while they were walking through the park.

"Yes, she already mentioned to me that you were being stupid." Coulson said before Clint could continue.

She...what?"

"Stark was bit less polite in his words." Clint stared at him, not understanding what was happening.

"I think we should move in together. What do you say?"

"One thing first. Why me? I mean I'm just one agent, hell, my whole team would marry you, even Tony, so why me of all people?"

"I'm going to pretend you didn't mention the bit about Stark." Coulson replied smoothly. "I don't know what you want from me? A report? Why does anyone fall in love with anybody?"

The casualness of those words moved something inside Clint.

"You really mean this, don't you?" He asked softly.

"I wouldn't have asked Fury and Stark if it was okay for me to move in with the Avengers if I wasn't serious." Coulson told him calmly. "And I still don't have your-"

"Yes, you have to know...yes," Clint wanted to reach over and kiss him but they were in a public place. Coulson let out a long suffering sigh and reached over to kiss him.


End file.
